Regretting Your Divorce? Here’s What People in Singapore Wish They Had Done Differently
Divorce is a life-changing decision that many people approach with a sense of finality. While some individuals feel relief and peace after a divorce, others may experience regret, wishing they had taken steps to fix their marriage before it was too late. Divorce is a costly and emotional process, and in Singapore, it’s not something that can be easily undone once finalised.
If you’re contemplating divorce or have recently gone through one, it’s important to reflect on what you truly want before making such a permanent decision.
Here are some of the most common regrets people have after divorce and the steps they wish they had taken differently:
Communicated More Effectively
One of the top regrets people express after divorce is the lack of effective communication. In a marriage, being able to openly express your thoughts and emotions is crucial. When couples fail to communicate well, misunderstandings and resentment can build, leading to a breakdown of trust. Many individuals wish they had taken the time to listen and speak with empathy, fostering a deeper connection with their spouse before the relationship unraveled.
Improving communication could mean being more open about needs, resolving conflicts in a constructive way, or even seeking professional help, such as couples counseling, before considering divorce.
Given More Attention to Their Spouse
Over time, life’s daily demands—work, children, and other responsibilities—can cause spouses to take each other for granted. Some divorced individuals regret not paying enough attention to their partner’s emotional needs. Neglect can lead to feelings of isolation and frustration in a marriage, making it easier for conflicts to escalate.
Being present and showing affection—whether through small acts of kindness or quality time—could have made a significant difference in maintaining the bond with their spouse.
Appreciated Their Partner More
It’s easy to lose sight of your partner’s contributions when you’re focused on your own struggles. Many divorced individuals realize too late that they didn’t fully appreciate their partner’s efforts. Whether it was taking care of the home, managing finances, or being a supportive parent, a lack of recognition often leads to a feeling of being undervalued in the relationship.
Taking the time to acknowledge and appreciate your partner’s contributions could help prevent resentment from building and may even reignite the mutual respect that once existed.
Criticized Less
Another common regret is being overly critical. Constant criticism can wear down any relationship, making a spouse feel inadequate or resentful. Some individuals wish they had chosen to focus on their partner’s positive attributes rather than picking apart their flaws. Being excessively negative can create an environment of hostility, which, over time, leads to emotional distance.
In hindsight, many divorced individuals wish they had been more patient and supportive, understanding that no one is perfect. By approaching situations with kindness, they could have built a more harmonious relationship.
Let Go of the Need to Always Be Right
Arguments in a marriage are inevitable, but some people feel the need to win every disagreement, creating an imbalance in the relationship. After a divorce, many regret not stepping back and acknowledging that their partner’s perspective had value. Constantly having to be right often leaves the other spouse feeling belittled and unworthy, which erodes the foundation of the relationship.
Rather than focusing on being right, successful couples often prioritize understanding and compromise. In hindsight, many wish they had approached arguments with more humility and a willingness to listen.
Take Time to Reflect Before Making a Decision
Divorce can be an emotionally charged decision, and it’s not uncommon for people to look back and wish they had handled things differently. If you’re currently considering divorce in Singapore, take time to reflect on your marriage, and consider whether there are steps you can take to repair the relationship. Communication, mutual appreciation, and kindness are often at the core of successful partnerships.
While not every marriage can or should be saved, seeking help from a marriage counselor or family therapist may provide clarity before making a final decision.
Seek Legal Advice and Guidance from Gloria James-Civetta
If you are considering divorce, it’s essential to have the right legal and emotional support. Gloria James-Civetta, the lead lawyer at GJC Law, is not only an experienced divorce lawyer but also a trained divorce coach. This unique combination allows her to offer comprehensive guidance, both legally and emotionally, to clients navigating the complexities of divorce.
As a divorce lawyer, Gloria provides expert legal advice on matters such as the division of matrimonial assets, child custody, and financial settlements, ensuring your rights are protected. Additionally, her role as a divorce coach enables her to offer emotional support, helping clients manage the stress and emotional upheaval that often accompanies divorce.
Gloria’s holistic approach allows her to guide clients through the divorce process with clarity and confidence, ensuring they are not only legally prepared but emotionally supported during this life-changing event. With her expertise, you can make informed decisions that safeguard your future.